A band of medieval mercenaries take revenge on a noble lord who decides not to pay them by kidnapping the betrothed of the noble’s son. As the plague and warfare cut a swathe of destruction throughout the land, the mercenaries hole up in a castle and await their fate. Written by Keith Loh {loh@sfu.ca}

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24 hours in L.A.; it’s raining cats and dogs. Two parallel and intercut stories dramatize men about to die: both are estranged from a grown child, both want to make contact, and neither child wants anything to do with dad. Earl Partridge’s son is a charismatic misogynist; Jimmy Gator’s daughter is a cokehead and waif. A mild and caring nurse intercedes for Earl, reaching the son; a prayerful and upright beat cop meets the daughter, is attracted to her, and leads her toward a new calm. Meanwhile, guilt consumes Earl’s young wife, while two whiz kids, one grown and a loser and the other young and pressured, face their situations. The weather, too, is quirky. Written by {jhailey@hotmail.com}

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1327: after a mysterious death in a Benedictine Abbey, the monks are convinced that the apocalypse is coming. With the Abbey to play host to a council on the Franciscan’s Order’s belief that the Church should rid itself of wealth, William of Baskerville, a respected Franciscan monk, is asked to assist in determining the cause of the untimely death. Alas, more deaths occur as the investigation draws closer to uncovering the secret the Abbey wants hidden, and there is finally no stopping the Holy Inquisition from taking an active hand in the process. William and his young novice must race against time to prove the innocence of the unjustly accused and avoid the wrath of Holy Inquisitor Bernardo Gui. Written by Rick Munoz {rick.munoz@his.com}

Do not go into “Bad Santa” thinking you’re about to see the normal ‘Christmas is magical, everyone goes to bed with visions of sugarplums dancing in their heads, and behind every Scrooge there’s a jolly old elf just waiting to emerge’ movie. First of all, Christmas is only magical for the first 15 minutes of shopping when the reality of overpriced presents and pushy crowds hasn’t yet sunk in. Secondly, I don’t know a single person who ever dreamed of sugarplums. And third, miraculous transformations are more in keeping with fairy tales than real life. Sometimes a Scrooge just is a Scrooge. “Bad Santa” takes those cynical thoughts to the extreme, gleefully lashing out at the holiday season and all those sticky sweet Hollywood movies with ho ho happy endings.

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In south Florida, a high school counselor is accused of rape by a manipulative rich girl and her trailer trash classmate. The cop on the case begins to suspect a conspiracy and dives into an elaborate and devious web of greed and betrayal to find the truth. Written by J.J. Jackson

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A man returns to his home town after being away and discovers a severed human ear in a field. Not satisfied with the police’s pace, he and the police detective’s daughter carry out their own investigation. The object of his investigation turns out to be a beautiful and mysterious woman involved with a violent and perversely evil man. Written by Mark Logan {marklo@west.sun.com}

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1950’s Los Angeles is the seedy backdrop for this intricate noir-ish tale of police corruption and Hollywood sleaze. Three very different cops are all after the truth, each in their own style: Ed Exley, the golden boy of the police force, willing to do almost anything to get ahead, except sell out; Bud White, ready to break the rules to seek justice, but barely able to keep his raging violence under control; and Jack Vincennes, always looking for celebrity and a quick buck until his conscience drives him to join Exley and White down the one-way path to find the truth behind the dark world of L.A. crime. Written by Greg Bole {bole@life.bio.sunysb.edu}

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Harry Angel has a new case, to find a man called Johnny Favourite. Except things aren’t quite that simple, and Johnny doesn’t want to be found. Let’s just say that, amongst the period detail and beautiful scenery, it all gets really, really nasty. Written by David Carroll {davidc@atom.ansto.gov.au}

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Two hundred and fifty years in the future, life as we know it is threatened by the arrival of Evil. Only the fifth element can stop the Evil from extinguishing life, as it tries to do every five thousand years. She is helped by ex-soldier, current-cab-driver, Korben Dallas, who is, in turn, helped by Prince/Arsenio clone, Ruby Rhod. Unfortunately, Evil is being assisted by Mr. Zorg, who seeks to profit from the chaos that Evil will bring, and his alien mercenaries. Written by David J. Gannon {dganno01@exch.eds.com}

I hate critics who include “I hate to admit this” as part of their reviews, but unfortunately I must join their ranks. Maybe I’ve used the line before and blocked it from my memory. If so, then I apologize. I watched the “Eurotrip” trailer, said ‘whatever,’ and went to the movie expecting a gross-out, raunchy teen-ish ‘R’-rated comedy with a few actual jokes that hit their marks surrounded by needless shots of naked female bodies. That’s what I expected but it’s not what “Eurotrip” delivered.

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