Charles Dreyfus escapes from the mental asylum and tries to kill Chief Inspector Jacques Clouseau. He doesn’t succeed at first, so he takes on another strategy, namely to build a Doom’s Day machine and demand that someone else kills Jacques Clouseau, or Dreyfus will use the machine to wipe out whole cities and even whole countries… With about 22 assassins from all over the globe on his tail, Clouseau decides to find Dreyfus alone and put him back in the mental asylum. Written by Lars J. Aas {larsa@colargol.edb.tih.no}

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A man returns to his home town after being away and discovers a severed human ear in a field. Not satisfied with the police’s pace, he and the police detective’s daughter carry out their own investigation. The object of his investigation turns out to be a beautiful and mysterious woman involved with a violent and perversely evil man. Written by Mark Logan {marklo@west.sun.com}

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Peter Pan (Williams) has grown up to be a cut-throat merger and acquisitions lawyer, and is married to Wendy’s granddaughter. Captain Hook (Hoffman) kidnaps his children, and Peter returns to Never Land with Tinkerbell (Roberts). With the help of her and the Lost Boys, he must remember how to be Peter Pan again in order to save his children by battling with Captain Hook once again. Written by Ed Sutton {esutton@mindspring.com}

Einar and Eric are two Viking half-brothers. The former is a great warrior whilst the other is an ex-slave, but neither knows the true identity of the other. When the throne of Northumbria in Britain becomes free for the taking, the two brothers compete against one another for the prize, but they have very different motives - both involving the princess Morgana, however. Written by Graeme Roy {gsr@cbmamiga.demon.co.uk}

Born in the Highlands of Scotland in 1518, Connor Macleod is immortal. When he is wounded in battle but does not die, he is banished from his village. He meets another like himself, Ramirez, who teaches him swordsmanship–the only way to kill another immortal is to take his head–and the ways of the immortals. Modern-day New York is the location of “The Gathering,” where Connor and the few remaining immortals must battle to the last for “The Prize.” Written by Jeff Hansen {jmh@umich.edu}

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Turkish and his close friend/accomplice Tommy get pulled into the world of match fixing by the notorious Brick Top. Things get complicated when the boxer they had lined up gets the shit kicked out of him by Pitt, a ‘pikey’ ( slang for an Irish Gypsy)- who comes into the equation after Turkish, an unlicensed boxing promoter wants to buy a caravan off the Irish Gypsies. They then try to convince Pitt not only to fight for them, but to lose for them too. Whilst all this is going on, a huge diamond heist takes place, and a fistful of motley characters enter the story, including ‘Cousin Avi’, ‘Boris The Blade‘, ‘Franky Four Fingers’ and ‘Bullet Tooth Tony’. Things go from bad to worse as it all becomes about the money, the guns, and the damned dog! Written by Filmtwob {webmaster@filmfreak.co.za}

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Professional daredevil and white-suited hero, The Great Leslie, convinces turn-of-the-century auto makers that a race from New York to Paris (westward across America, the Bering Straight and Russia) will help to promote automobile sales. Leslie’s arch-rival, the mustached and black-attired Professor Fate vows to beat Leslie to the finish line in a car of Fate’s own invention. The Blake Edwards style of slapstick and song originated with this movie. A dedication to Laurel and Hardy appears at the beginning of the film. Edwards’ tribute to Stan and Ollie can be seen most clearly in the interaction between Professor Fate and his cohort Max, as well as in the operatic Pottsdorf pie fight. Written by Jeanne Baker {jbaker@erim.org}

A con man flees to Southeast Asia when an international scam he was involved in goes sour. Suspecting he’s been double-crossed by his long-time mentor, he sets off to Cambodia for his promised cut. What he finds there is a mysterious and hostile environment where even the most polished criminal can end up on deadly ground. Written by Sujit R. Varma

“Firewall” tries a couple of new tricks and relies heavily on the use of modern technology to build up the suspense but ultimately this lackluster effort starring a very dour Harrison Ford fails to engage the audience. “Firewall” is predictable and formulaic, without either enough action or thrills (or convincing dialogue) to make it distinguishable from the herd.

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When her son disappears and is believed to be dead, a single mother blames an African-American man from the projects for the kidnapping, creating a racial controversy. An African-American detective (Jackson) and a white missing child researcher team up to investigate the case, which they discover may be more complicated than they expected. Written by ljl5@aol.com

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