Elvis lives! I knew it all along. No way could The King die on a toilet. It’s much more reasonable to believe he traded places with an impersonator to live out his life in relative obscurity, playing dive bars and Indian casinos, having a grand ol’ time pulling the wool over everyone’s eyes.

(more…)

John Lyshitski is a car stealing slacker, with a weed problem, and has been in Illinois’ Rossmore State Penitentiary so many times, he knows it’s entire population of both staff and cons by their fast names. Cursed with the old ill luck of being in the wrong place, at the wrong time, in possession of the wrong car, he’s been deemed a lost cause repeat offender in the eyes of everyone else. When the heartless judge, who has been behind most of his sentences, goes to the big court house in the sky, John decides to ruin the man’s legacy by having the judge’s only offspring, Nelson Biederman IV, thrown in the slammer along with him. Here, the world-class selfish jerk learns a certain old lesson the hard way: Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. But has John somewhat gone too far in the payback department? Written by ????

Best friends, a priest and a rabbi, fall in love with the same girl. However, neither of the men can pursue the relationship due to their religious beliefs: the priest cannot break his vow of celibacy and the rabbi cannot marry her since she is not Jewish. Written by Anonymous

(more…)

Mona Dearly, a spiteful, loud-mouthed, unpopular woman dies when the car she is driving in plunges off a cliff and into a river near the small upstate New York town where she lives. Wyatt Rash, the local police chief, investivates and suspects foul play in Mona’s death and tries to contain the whole town whom all are suspects who include Wyatt’s daughter Ellen, who is going to marry landscape artist Bobby Calzone whose business was suffering from his lazy business partner, Jeff, Mona’s slow-witted son, as well as waitress Rona Mace, who was having an affair with Mona’s husband. Written by {pataygs@voicenet.com}

(more…)

A rare mutation has occurred within the vampire community. The Reaper. A vampire so consumed with an insatiable bloodlust that they prey on vampires as well as humans, transforming victims who are unlucky enough to survive into Reapers themselves. Now their quickly expanding population threatens the existence of vampires, and soon there won’t be enough humans in the world to satisfy their bloodlust. Blade, Whistler (Yes, he’s back) and an armory expert named Scud are curiously summoned by the Shadow Council. The council reluctantly admits that they are in a dire situation and they require Blade’s assistance. Blade then tenuously enters into an alliance with The Bloodpack, an elite team of vampires trained in all modes of combat to defeat the Reaper threat. Blade’s team and the Bloodpack are the only line of defense which can prevent the Reaper population from wiping out the vampire and human populations. Written by Sean Daly

(more…)

Matt (Patrick Muldoon) is haunted by the death of a girl from a car accident he caused years ago. Matt was drunk and as he reached for the car radio, he struck the girl as she crossed the road. The guilt that he feels has altered his sense of reality, making Matt’s life a mystery full of shadows and phantoms. Now, years later Matt goes away for weekend with his new girlfriend Dawn. After a wild session of lovemaking, Dawn goes for a walk. While she is away a strange man with an axe comes into the motel room and attacks Matt. After that incident Matt goes into the woods, looking for Dawn. There he encounters Dawn’s family who tie him down and put him on trail for the murder of the girl years before. They find him guilty and he is sent back into the forest to be hunted down by the family. The deeper Matt runs into the forest the farther his mind is lost to the Blackwoods. Written by {krijn@hotmail.com}

An undercover narc dies, the investigation stalls, so the Detroit P.D. brings back Nick Tellis, fired 18-months ago when a stray bullet hits a pregnant woman. Tellis teams with Henry Oak, a friend of the dead narc and an aggressive cop constantly under the scrutiny of internal affairs. They follow leads, informants turn up dead, Nick’s wife is unhappy he’s back on the street, Henry’s protective of the dead cop’s wife. Nick reads and re-reads the case file, broods, watches Oak’s heavy-handed style, sometimes joining in. The brass want to close out the case, Nick and Henry stay on it, and bits of evidence point them to an auto body shop. What actually happened; will Nick ever know? Written by {jhailey@hotmail.com}

Four boys growing up in Hell’s Kitchen play a prank that leads to an old man getting hurt. Sentenced to no less than one year in the Wilkenson Center in upstate New York, the four friends are changed by the beating, humiliation and sexual abuse by the guards sworn to protect them. Thirteen years later and a chance meeting lead to a chance for revenge against the Wilkenson Center and the guards. Written by Albert@SaveKoalas.com

An American teenager who is obsessed with Hong Kong cinema and kung-fu classics makes an extraordinary discovery in a Chinatown pawnshop: the legendary stick weapon of the Chinese sage and warrior, the Monkey King. With the lost relic in hand, the teenager unexpectedly finds himself traveling back to ancient China to join a crew of warriors from martial arts lore on a dangerous quest to free the imprisoned Monkey King. Written by Anonymous

The trailer for “The Forgotten” gives too much away and that’s a shame. The less you know going in, the better. It’s tough to thrill audiences when the plot is totally laid out in advance. All the anticipation is ripped away when the best scenes from the film are played over and over again on TV and on the Internet. With “The Forgotten,” knowing too much going in ruins the enjoyment you might have gotten out of the moviegoing experience.

(more…)