Charles Dreyfus escapes from the mental asylum and tries to kill Chief Inspector Jacques Clouseau. He doesn’t succeed at first, so he takes on another strategy, namely to build a Doom’s Day machine and demand that someone else kills Jacques Clouseau, or Dreyfus will use the machine to wipe out whole cities and even whole countries… With about 22 assassins from all over the globe on his tail, Clouseau decides to find Dreyfus alone and put him back in the mental asylum. Written by Lars J. Aas {larsa@colargol.edb.tih.no}

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When rich M. Ballon’s spanish driver is found shot dead, Inspector Jacques Clouseau is the first official on the scene. All evidence suggests Maria Gambrelli, the maid, to be the murderer. But Clouseau, being attracted to the beautiful girl, is convinced that she is hiding something. So, he has her released from jail and tries to follow her secretly. Things do not work out the way the inspector wanted and people keep being murdered, and each time innocent Maria seems to be the killer. But with someone important wanting Clouseau and nobody else to cover this case, his tolerance-challenged boss Charles Dreyfuss is close to losing his mind when casualties keep turning up. And Clouseau keeps on causing trouble without knowing it… Written by Julian Reischl {julianreischl@mac.com}

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A man is murdered. Two men witness it. A blind man who hears the killer, and a deaf man who sees her. The police don’t think they’re credible witnesses, but the killers don’t want to take any chances. The two men must now work together to save themselves and bring the killers to justice. Written by Jean-Marc Rocher {tss.yh.nec.co.jp}

Cookie’s Fortune unfolds over an eventful Easter weekend in the small town of Holly Springs, Mississippi. The town residents are peaceful, kind folk–with the exception of Camille Dixon (Glenn Close)–a pushy theatre director with an incredibly shy younger sister, Cora (Julianne Moore), whose estranged daughter Emma (Liv Tyler) has just returned to town. On the heels of her latest play, Camille is shocked to discover that her Aunt Jewel Mae “Cookie” Orcutt (Patricia Neal) has committed suicide. Terrified at the thought of how this will tarnish the family name, she eats the suicide note to make it look like a burglary. This set-up leads the police to one main suspect, Willis Richland (Charles S. Dutton), who also happens to be Cookie’s best friend. Although the rest of the town is convinced Willis didn’t commit the crime, an outside investigator (Courtney B. Vance) isn’t so sure. As Easter Sunday and opening night of the play arrive, the truth comes out, revealing more secrets than anyone could have possibly imagined. Director Altman tells his story at a leisurely pace, beautifully recreating the eccentricities of small town life in this sweet-natured tale. Written by Anonymous

Queen Latifah is the reason to see “Last Holiday.” This generally entertaining remake of the 1950 film starring Alec Guinness only fully blossoms when Queen Latifah is on the screen. Fortunately for audiences, Queen Latifah is in 99% of the scenes.

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Having given permission to male nurse Greg Focker to marry his daughter, ex-CIA man Jack Byrnes and his wife travel to Miami to Greg’s parents, who this time around are Mr. and Mrs. Focker, who are as different from them as can be. As asked in the first movie, what sort of people name their son Gaylord M. Focker? Written by Uber Minion

Romantic comedy set in London in the late 16th century: Young playwright William Shakespeare struggles with his latest work “Romeo and Ethel the Pirate’s Daughter”. A great fan of Shakespeare’s plays is young, wealthy Viola who is about to be married to the cold-hearted Lord Wessex, but constantly dreams of becoming an actress. Women were not allowed to act on stage at that time (female roles were played by men, too), but dressed up as a boy, Viola successfully auditions for the part of Romeo. Soon she and William are caught in a forbidden romance that provides rich inspiration for his play. Written by Armin Ortmann {armin@sfb288.math.tu-berlin.de}

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Michael Dorsey is an unemployed actor with an impossible reputation. In order to find work and fund his friend’s play he dresses as a woman, Dorothy Michaels, and lands the part in a daytime drama. Dorsey loses himself in this woman role and essentially becomes Dorothy Michaels, captivating women all around the city and inspiring them to break free from the control of men and become more like Dorsey’s initial identity. This newfound role, however, lands Dorsey in a hot spot between a female friend/’lover,’ a female co-star he falls in love with, that co-star’s father who falls in love with him, and a male co-star who yearns for his affection. Written by Bryan Kuniyoshi

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Remember the good old days of 2003 when audiences had the choice of the shiny, happy “Elf” or the distinctly darker comedy, “Bad Santa?” Oh, if only one of those two holiday films had been released in 2004… But no, this year’s servings of holiday treats, including “Christmas with the Kranks,” have all the appeal of week-old, dried out turkey.

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Rowan plays the eponymous lead character in a spoof spy thriller. During the course of the story we follow our hero as he attempts to single-handedly save the country from falling into the hands of a despot. Written by Alistair Knight

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