John Lyshitski is a car stealing slacker, with a weed problem, and has been in Illinois’ Rossmore State Penitentiary so many times, he knows it’s entire population of both staff and cons by their fast names. Cursed with the old ill luck of being in the wrong place, at the wrong time, in possession of the wrong car, he’s been deemed a lost cause repeat offender in the eyes of everyone else. When the heartless judge, who has been behind most of his sentences, goes to the big court house in the sky, John decides to ruin the man’s legacy by having the judge’s only offspring, Nelson Biederman IV, thrown in the slammer along with him. Here, the world-class selfish jerk learns a certain old lesson the hard way: Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. But has John somewhat gone too far in the payback department? Written by ????

Everyone’s born with one special thing, and Eddie Adams uses his humongous “asset” to take the world of film pornography by storm. Things get ugly though when success leads to drugs and ruin. Will Dirk clean up and get back on top? Will Amber see her son? Will Rollergirl ever take off her skates?! Written by Film Student Boy {gillease@scf.usc.edu}

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Mel Coplin departs on a mission of discovery dragging his wife and 4 month old son behind. He and wife, Nancy, won’t agree on a name for their son until adopted Mel gets in touch with his roots. He assures her that once he knows who he really is, the right name for their boy will be a snap. Enlisting the aid of student-psychologist and part-time adoption agent, Tina Kalb, they embark on a journey across the United States to find Mel’s “birth” mother. “The best part,” Mel tells Nancy, “is it’s all free.” Tina is finishing her dissertation and will film the happy reunion of mother and child as part of her research. For this privilege, she’s footing the bill. His adoptive parents are left behind feeling abandoned by an ungrateful son. Clerical errors, mistaken identities, Nancy’s misplaced high school friend and his gay lover, and a super-charged libido here and there are thrown into the mix along the way until — at last — Mel’s real parents, the Schlictings (mispronounced as “Shit-kings” by Mrs. Coplin), are discovered in remote New Mexico. There, Mel begins to wonder if he would have been better off not knowing these people, after all. Written by MARK FLEETWOOD {mfleetwo@mail.coin.missouri.edu}

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Six incarnations of Bob Dylan: an actor, a folk singer, an electrified troubadour, Rimbaud, Billy the Kid, and Woody Guthrie. Put Dylan’s music behind their adventures, soliloquies, interviews, marriage, and infidelity. Recreate 1960s documentaries in black and white. Put each at a crossroads, the artist becoming someone else. Jack, the son of Ramblin’ Jack Elliott, finds Jesus; handsome Robbie falls in love then abandons Claire. Woody, a lad escaped from foster care, hobos the U.S. singing; Billy awakes in a valley threatened by a six-lane highway; Rimbaud talks. Jude, booed at Newport when he goes electric, fences with reporters, pundits, and fans. He won’t be classified. Written by {jhailey@hotmail.com}

An undercover narc dies, the investigation stalls, so the Detroit P.D. brings back Nick Tellis, fired 18-months ago when a stray bullet hits a pregnant woman. Tellis teams with Henry Oak, a friend of the dead narc and an aggressive cop constantly under the scrutiny of internal affairs. They follow leads, informants turn up dead, Nick’s wife is unhappy he’s back on the street, Henry’s protective of the dead cop’s wife. Nick reads and re-reads the case file, broods, watches Oak’s heavy-handed style, sometimes joining in. The brass want to close out the case, Nick and Henry stay on it, and bits of evidence point them to an auto body shop. What actually happened; will Nick ever know? Written by {jhailey@hotmail.com}

Clarence and Alabama are newlyweds who acquire an unexpected wedding present. Unknown to the blissfully happy couple, ruthless gangsters are on their tail, determined to reclaim their lost property Written by Rob Hartill

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A former drug lord returns from prison determined to wipe out all his competition and distribute the profits of his operations to the city’s poor in this stylish and ultraviolent modern twist on Robin Hood. Written by Keith Loh {loh@sfu.ca}

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David Huxley is an American politician living in Hungary whom gets blackmailed by an unknown party after being videotaped having sex with his fiancée Tish and a local supermodel. Desperate to find the extortionists, David goes into the sordid Red Light district of Eastern Europe, only to end up kidnapped, leaving Tish to try to come up with a $5 million ransom on her own. Written by Anonymous

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When his father dies, Peter Gaulke inherits “Strange Wilderness,” dad’s TV show about animals. After ratings plummet and the show is canceled, we watch a long flashback to see its demise. The studio head gives the show two more weeks. An old friend brings a story about Bigfoot in Ecuador, so a long road trip ensues with stops along the way and enough problems, misjudgments, and deaths to sink a less intrepid band. Peter’s team faces competition from a better-funded and more practiced set of rivals. Who will find Bigfoot first, and will they get it on tape and save the show? Can Peter make dad proud? Written by {jhailey@hotmail.com}

In this action thriller, Denzel Washington plays Nick Styles, the assistant district attorney of L.A. The film opens in his early days as a cop on the L.A.P.D. During a carnival, master criminal Earl Talbot Blake (John Lithgow) creates a scene after a botched drug deal. Styles and Blake confront each other, during which Blake is wounded by Styles and later sent to prison. Seven years later, Blake escapes from prison during a parole board hearing to carry out his revenge against Styles, and what follows is a violent series of events that destroys Styles’ career. This sets the stage for one last bloody duel between Styles and Blake. Written by Stephen Currence {billyc@erols.com}

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