In this sequel to the Evil Dead films, a discount-store employee (”Name’s Ash. Housewares.”) is time-warped to a medieval castle beset by monstrous forces. Initially mistaken for an enemy, he is soon revealed as the prophecised savior who can quest for the Necronomicon, a book which can dispel the evil. Unfortunately, he screws up the magic words while collecting the tome, and releases an army of skeletons, led by his own Deadite counterpart. What follows is a thrilling, yet tongue-in-cheek battle between Ash’s 20th Century tactics and the minions of darkness. Written by David Thiel {d-thiel@uiuc.edu}

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Hondo Lane, a despatch rider for the cavalry, encounters Angie Lowe, a woman living alone with her young son in the midst of hostile Apache territory. She presumes she is safe because the Apaches, under their chief Vittorio, have always left them alone. Later Lane has a run-in with Angie’s reprobate husband and is forced to kill him, not knowing who he is. Vittorio captures Lane and to save his life, Angie tells the Apache chief that Lane is her husband, unaware that Lane has killed her real husband. In order to protect her from a forced marriage with one of the Apache, Lane reluctantly goes along with the lie, though he knows the truth must eventually come out, to Vittorio and to Angie, both. Written by Jim Beaver {jumblejim@prodigy.net}

Ridley, Ridley, Ridley. I enjoyed your “Gladiator” and marveled at your ability to make the past come alive, so it pains me to say “Kingdom of Heaven” is no “Gladiator.” It’s not even a “Troy.” It’s better than Oliver Stone’s “Alexander,” but that’s not saying much.

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“Two Knights…Two Horses…Two Pieces of Sharp Lumber…
But, Only One Chick…Do the Math”

Backed by the throbbing sound of Queen’s “We Will Rock You,” “A Knight’s Tale” opens by immediately letting you know, in no uncertain terms, that this is no ordinary tale of jousting and medieval times. Mixing classic rock with medieval stylings, “A Knight’s Tale” is a wild ride that never takes itself seriously. From the booming beat of “The Boys are Back in Town” to the mixture of modern-day and medieval dialogue, “A Knight’s Tale” is pure entertainment.

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Stranded in 1955, Marty McFly receives written word from his friend, Doctor Emmett Brown, as to where can be found the DeLorean time machine. However, an unfortunate discovery prompts Marty to go to his friend’s aid. Using the time machine, Marty travels to the old west where his friend has run afoul of a gang of thugs and has fallen in love with a local schoolteacher. Using the technology from the time, Marty and Emmett devise one last chance to send the two of them back to the future. Written by Vampire Sharpshooter

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Taken just at face value, “Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl” has a lot going against it. First, it’s loosely based on a popular Disney theme park ride - and tagging “The Curse of the Black Pearl” after the title doesn’t soften the initial blow. Secondly, it’s a pirate movie and that particular genre hasn’t done very well in the past 10 or so years. And finally, it’s hitting theaters at the same time as every other big effects/action drama seems to have chosen to set upon audiences.

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